The
penultimate question from How I Met Your Mother
I
should have written this post on 11 April, 2016 because that’s the day I saw
the last episode of How I Met Your Mother. Now there are a lot of details I
don’t accurately recall but the essence is still there so I shall go ahead with
this post.
Selfless love..
Ted
loved Robin selflessly to the extent of “I would open a vein in my arm if I
could bleed that locket out, just to make her happy.” One scene which stands
out for me is when a little while after Robin pushes Ted away telling him that
it’s not his job to make her happy (she was going through a rough patch), Ted
gives her to sweetest Christmas gift (see video :
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yIketnYAMlo)
. He says,
“Look,
you don't want to tell me what's wrong, fine
I don't need to know.
But you can never stop me from trying to
cheer you up.
It's a fact of life.
You're just gonna have to deal with it.”
And
then there was this in season 9:
"Actually,
there is a word for that. It’s love. I’m in love with her, okay? If you’re
looking for the word that means caring about someone beyond all rationality and
wanting them to have everything they want no matter how much it destroys you,
it’s love. And when you love someone you just, you…you don’t stop, ever. Even
when people roll their eyes, and call you crazy. Even then. Especially then.
You just– you don’t give up. Because if I could just give up…if I could just,
you know, take the whole world’s advice and– and move on and find someone else,
that wouldn’t be love. That would be… that would be some other disposable thing
that is not worth fighting for. But I– that is not what this is.”
Now
I could post all of my favourite quotes from the show to further prove my point
about how altruistic his love was but I shall move on to the next point for
now.
Robin with Barney!?
For
the first eight out of total nine seasons of How I Met Your Mother, I shipped
for Ted and Robin. I failed to understand why Robin was stupid enough to choose
the promiscuous Barney over Ted as her husband. Look, I get it- Barney was the
one with all thrills and frills. But how long could that ever last? As we see
in season 9, they break things off after 3 years of their marriage.
Robin (not) with Ted..
Examining
it from a psychological point of view, we humans are extremely callous when we
are on the receiving end of affection, especially when it is not requited as
much by us. We take the love we receive for granted. We don’t value it as much
because it just wasn’t hard enough to get. That’s the thing- we need to stop
looking at relationships like some accomplishment that we need to work for.
True love should be effortless and easy. Not one with mind games.
Did
Robin make a mistake by not choosing Ted? Unqualified yes.
Ted Mosby
When
the mother in How I Met Your Mother was first revealed (last episode of season
8), I did not like her even a bit. For it seemed as if Ted was settling down
for the first sane person he saw after Robin got married.
What
I love about How I Met Your Mother the most is that I can relate to all the
important lines of its plot. In this case, it’s highly likely that Ted did have
a mental block in his head- he was looking for Robin in every girl he dated
after her. And it was only when she was about to get married that he let go of
her (not completely but substantially enough)- and he started to appreciate
what life had to offer to him instead of chasing what life always kept an inch
(and painfully, neither less nor more) away from him. This is probably when the
epiphany struck him.
Robin
Scherbatsky: Shouldn't I be with the guy (referring to Ted) who finds me my
locket? The guy who steals me the Blue French Horn? I mean, look me in the eye
and tell me: Why shouldn't I be with that guy?
Ted
Mosby: Because I'm not that guy anymore.
Here’s
the verdict then : It’s not that he did not deserve Robin, but that Robin did
not deserve him.
Tracy McConnell
I
fell in love with Tracy- basically the connection between Ted and Tracy. I feel
what he had for Robin was the kind of love that grows from an infatuation – one
where you overlook how the other person is not the best person out there for
you. But with Tracy, it was pure. Its beauty was in its simplicity. He did not
feel anxious or uneasy with her- it seemed as natural as breathing. They had
the best of times together- she was always keenly interested in his three
hundred stories, they went to their favourite places together and most
importantly they understood each other. To quote myself from the poem ‘June’ –
The
fact that it didn’t last
Doesn’t
make it any less beautiful”
Back to Robin
Or
I should say, back to square one. This is something that a lot of people found
odd and cursed the writers for giving the show such an eerie end. In my
opinion, it’s the most true to life end. How true is it that we’re all in a
vicious circle? That no matter how hard we try to get away from things and
people, we end swivelling back to them. There was always going to be a special
corner in Ted’s heart for Robin. Tracy accepted that and Ted hoped that his
kids would too. The fact that the show ends with Ted standing below Robin’s
apartment with the Blue French Horn does in no way diminish the love he had for
Tracy. It’s just how life is.
Lessons
Lily
raises a toast to Ted in the last episode, “To Ted Evelyn Mosby a man with more
emotional endurance than anyone I know. It was a long, difficult road. Thank
God we finally got here."
Ted
then tells the kids that Lily was right and the road was long and difficult,
but he's glad it was because if he hadn't gone through hell to get there,
"the lesson might not have been as clear." He says he knew he had to
love their mother as much as he could for as long as he could. He carried the
lesson with him through every fight they had and every other moment. He says he
carried it with him when she got sick.
And
that’s life- if it wasn’t hard, how would we ever learn from its challenges,
how would we ever appreciate its beauty?
“Kids,
I've been telling you the story of how I met your mother, and while there's
many things to learn from this story, this may be the biggest. The great
moments of your life won't necessarily be the things you do, they'll also be
the things that happen to you. Now, I'm not saying you can't take action to
affect the outcome of your life, you have to take action, and you will. But
never forget that on any day, you can step out the front door and your whole
life can change forever. You see, the universe has a plan kids, and that plan
is always in motion. A butterfly flaps its wings, and it starts to rain. It's a
scary thought but it's also kind of wonderful. All these little parts of the
machine constantly working, making sure that you end up exactly where you're
supposed to be, exactly when you're supposed to be there. The right place at
the right time.”
-----------------
Further reads:
1. Some of my favourite Ted Mosby quotes
“I
don't want to be choosing between two girls. I want to be a complete head over
heels idiot for one!”
"There
are 2 big days in any love story... the day you meet the girl of your dreams...
and the day you marry her."
“Sometimes
love means taking a step back. If you care about somebody, you should want them
to be happy even if you wind up being left out.”
"If
you’re not scared, then you’re not taking a chance. If you’re not taking a
chance, then what the hell are you doing anyway?”
“Here's
the thing about mistakes: Sometimes, even when you know something’s a mistake,
you gotta make it anyway.”
“I
remember how she makes me feel, I just don’t completely remember her. It’s like
I’m trying to preserve something that’s already gone.”
“Because
in the end, the only thing that can heal a broken heart is time..."
“You
never know when you're about to meet someone very important. It's not like life
gives you a warning. You just look up and there they are.”
“You
will be shocked kids, when you discover how easy it is in life to part ways
with people forever. That's why, when you find someone you want to keep around,
you do something about it.”
"But
love doesn't make sense. You can't logic your way into or out of it. Love is
totally nonsensical. But we have to keep doing it, or else we're lost and love
is dead and humanity should just pack it in. Because love is the best thing we
do."
"Here's
the secret kids. None of us can vow to be perfect. In the end all we can do is
promise to love each other with everything we've got. Because love is the best
thing we do."
2. Josh Radnor (the person who plays Ted)
talks about Fame’s lesson plan at INKtalks
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